Q: What forms of energy are most commonly used in your native country? What problems have been caused or are likely to happen by using these energy sources? What political or social solutions would you propose to prevent or to solve energy-related problems in your country?
Essay:
The number one enegery source in Korea is "Uranium", neuclear power. We have some nuclear power plants. The problem of these plants is wastes produced from the processing of the Uranium. There are still debates on the effects of the wastes; however residents living near the waste facility are afraid of being exposed to radiation. Korea does not have any natural resources so to speak; however, there are some alternatives to produce environment friendly energy.
First of all, we can use "Solar energy". Korea has nice, hot summers. All year round, we can enjoy nice sun. Suing solar energy doesn't create pollution and it is free and unlimited. Some local residents has built a huge solar energy distribution center at their own cost, and they have sold the energy to local manufacturing companies. They not only use it for themselves, but alos they earn money from the center. In addition to that, the use of solar energy is encouraged by the government thesedays, subsidizing the cost of the equipment.
Secondly, we can use tide as well. Korea is a peninsula and it has three seashores. At the west seaside, everyday we can see a tide. The sea goes out like 100kim away, and comes back at a very high speed. We can not only enjoy the scene, but we can also create energy from it. If we build a power plant there, at least people living near the sea can save their money for the electricity, heat and airconditioning.
All Koreans used to be taught that we do not have natural resources, so we should import energy from other countries and produce things to sell. However, we only looked into conventional energy. Wind, water, sun, and others, all countries in the world have at least one energy source. In my opinion, since importing fuel energy was cheaper than building facilities for natural energy, we used to make the easy choice. However, it is time we should wash our brain with new ideas. Using conventional energy will harm our environment, and we cannot survive without nature. Even though the start might be difficult, we should begin for our next generation. Now is the time to use real natural resources.
boss 1
16 years ago
1 comment:
Your essay answers all the questions that the prompt asks, and that's a really good thing. Probably the #1 problem with test answers is that the student has not read the question carefully enough. Always read the question -- it will tell you how it should be answerd!
At the same time, although your structure is o.k., it could be better. In your first paragraph, you both name the major kind of power used in Korea, and you also describe it's problems. A better balanced comparison and contrast paragraph would spend a little more time describing nuclear power and why Korea has so much of it, and then turn to the problems. "On the other hand, nuclear power brings some problems . . ."
The rest of it is great -- with just a need for more accurate transition vocabulary: conjunctive adverbs, reference forms, etc. maybe the Swales and feak book would help you there -- you might try coming back to this essay in the future, after working through that book, and looking for ways to clarify the relations between your ideas.
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